To all my single friends, or anyone who questions their value or self-worth on their own, repeat these words after me: I am enough. I am whole.
I see people struggle with this: people who want to be in a relationship and can’t find one, people who have been in relationship after relationship that just wasn’t right, people who (maybe) are just coming out of a relationship and don’t know where to go from here.
People who–sometimes–don’t feel complete, because they don’t have their other half. They haven’t found their soulmate.
You are enough. Just as you are, without someone else. You are a whole, complete, fabulous person. You aren’t missing a piece of you. You are you. And you are wonderful. You are valuable. Just as you are.
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And being in a relationship with someone who loves you is a wonderful, beautiful thing. If that’s your desire, I pray you find someone to share your life with. But I also pray that you find peace with yourself and who you are, that you find comfort with who you are, that you see yourself as whole and complete while you wait. That you don’t settle for someone who doesn’t love you as you deserve to be loved, just because you want that relationship. That you don’t settle for someone who wants you to change to fit them. I pray you find someone who sees you as a whole, complete person; someone who loves that whole, complete person and wants to spend their life with that person.
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Someone who knows that as you grow older and experience new things and places in life you’ll change. Someone who is ready for and excited to see how you’ll change and grow as you go through this thing called life. I pray that you find someone who will hold you accountable and challenge you to grow and strive to the best person–the best whole, complete person–you can be, while giving you room to find just who that person is. And I pray that in return, you know that the person you find will also change. That you’re excited to stand by their side as they grow and strive to be the best whole, complete person they can be, and give them room to find just who that person is.
In the meantime, I pray you also found peace with life as it now. Your life is beautiful and wonderful now, too. There are so many things to do, adventures to be had. Sometimes it feels like it would be easier to have someone else, but just like singleness has its pros and cons, so does marriage and spending your life with someone. A married friend and I talk about this all the time. Marriage won’t fix life or make it better. It will enhance it in different ways than singleness does and add some different challenges.
And on those days that you question where you are in life; that you feel incomplete on your own, repeat these words: I am enough. I am whole. Just as I am.
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