To all my single friends, or anyone who questions their value or self-worth on their own, repeat these words after me: I am enough. I am whole.
I see people struggle with this: people who want to be in a relationship and can’t find one, people who have been in relationship after relationship that just wasn’t right, people who (maybe) are just coming out of a relationship and don’t know where to go from here.
People who–sometimes–don’t feel complete, because they don’t have their other half. They haven’t found their soulmate.
You are enough. Just as you are, without someone else. You are a whole, complete, fabulous person. You aren’t missing a piece of you. You are you. And you are wonderful. You are valuable. Just as you are.
[Tweet “You are you. You are enough. You are wonderful. You are valuable. Just as you are.”]
And being in a relationship with someone who loves you is a wonderful, beautiful thing. If that’s your desire, I pray you find someone to share your life with. But I also pray that you find peace with yourself and who you are, that you find comfort with who you are, that you see yourself as whole and complete while you wait. That you don’t settle for someone who doesn’t love you as you deserve to be loved, just because you want that relationship. That you don’t settle for someone who wants you to change to fit them. I pray you find someone who sees you as a whole, complete person; someone who loves that whole, complete person and wants to spend their life with that person.
[Tweet “To my single friends: you aren’t missing a piece of you. You are a whole, complete, fabulous person.”]
Someone who knows that as you grow older and experience new things and places in life you’ll change. Someone who is ready for and excited to see how you’ll change and grow as you go through this thing called life. I pray that you find someone who will hold you accountable and challenge you to grow and strive to the best person–the best whole, complete person–you can be, while giving you room to find just who that person is. And I pray that in return, you know that the person you find will also change. That you’re excited to stand by their side as they grow and strive to be the best whole, complete person they can be, and give them room to find just who that person is.
In the meantime, I pray you also found peace with life as it now. Your life is beautiful and wonderful now, too. There are so many things to do, adventures to be had. Sometimes it feels like it would be easier to have someone else, but just like singleness has its pros and cons, so does marriage and spending your life with someone. A married friend and I talk about this all the time. Marriage won’t fix life or make it better. It will enhance it in different ways than singleness does and add some different challenges.
And on those days that you question where you are in life; that you feel incomplete on your own, repeat these words: I am enough. I am whole. Just as I am.
[Tweet “On those days that you question where are in life, repeat these words: I am enough. Just as I am.”]
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15 Comments
Melissa Marie
February 20, 2018 at 8:03 amI can think of a few people who could benefit from this post. Sometimes bad experiences with dating and relationships leaves people feeling jaded and with little confidence in themselves as someone worthy to love. I want my friends who feel this way to read this.
Melanie
February 20, 2018 at 8:59 amThis is such a meaningful post. It is so important to hear and remember these words from time to time.
Maegan Lin O'Loughlin
February 20, 2018 at 9:03 amI really like this perspective. I’m married and have learned so many things from my wonderful husband, but I don’t have more worth because I’m married! I hope I can be a good support like your married friend is and encourage others in knowing they are fabulous and enough.
Beth Kondrick
February 20, 2018 at 9:50 amThis is beautiful and I want to share it with all my single friends. I think it’s something many people need to hear. <3
Charlotte
February 20, 2018 at 11:13 amOh, yes…
Crystal, everything that you say here is absolutely 100% true. I once had a friend tell me that in order to thrive in a relationship, I had to learn to live with myself first. I realized over the years how incredibly true that advice was. And your friend totally hit it on the head with her advice about marriage–it doesn’t fix anything, and can (at times) create a whole new set of obstacles. But those challenges in life are what make life worth living, because they can teach us EVERYTHING.
Thanks so much for this wonderful post, Crystal–hope you’re having a great week!
Angel Penn
February 20, 2018 at 4:48 pmYes, yes and a thousand times YES. Making peace with the person that you are first is soooooo important.
Willow Moon
February 20, 2018 at 5:55 pmI think that when you do realize that you are enough and aren’t looking for someone, that’s when you will find the one.
Kim
February 20, 2018 at 6:57 pmThis message is always relevant and a good reminder to all.
Jess // Foreign Room
February 20, 2018 at 10:55 pmThis was truly beautiful. Really a great reminder to all, whether in a relationship or not.
Karli Ellis
February 21, 2018 at 12:38 pmI love what you said and I love the tweets you have set up! You are enough and we can’t ever say that enough!
Taylor Smith
February 22, 2018 at 10:20 amThis is wonderful. Fabulous advice!!!
Lisa
February 23, 2018 at 7:58 amGreat reminder!
Brittney Kubicki
February 27, 2018 at 11:19 amThis is so encouraging for everyone, not just people who are single. It’s so important to love who we are in our own skin! Beautifully written!
Marta
February 27, 2018 at 11:35 amTHIS! I used to tell myself, and now tell my friends to tell themselves, “I am fabulous as I am. I don’t need anyone to complete what God has already deemed worthy.” This is always a good reminder!
Lindsey Willson
February 28, 2018 at 6:47 amBeautifully written, I think you have expressed recognizing the concept of a positive self-worth very clearly.